Which is best: Texting or Talking? The answer depends on your generation

“You’re fired!” No, that’s not Donald Trump. It was what a 45 year old manager was ready to say to three of his new hires.


The new hires were all Millennials (under 30). Instead of paying attention in meetings, they were actively texting and tweeting through their phones, which the manager considered very rude. The new employees never initiated a call to the manager on the phone. So the manager called them, but they never picked up their phone. So he left a voice message, but the response would arrive several days later—in email. The manager concluded that all three of the new employees just didn’t know how to communicate correctly at work.

These communication problems went on for about three weeks. Totally frustrated, the manager finally asked each all three into his office, one at a time. The manager then said, “You need to learn how we communicate around here. In this company, we use email and voice mail. Stop texting and tweeting in my meetings, or else.” All three quit that very day.

If the manager had understood generational differences in how Boomers communicate differently than Millennials, there could have been a much better outcome.

Millennials (teens-30 years old) consider it rude and intrusive to call someone on the phone. They feel that the phone ring interrupts whatever the recipient is doing at that moment. They feel it is far less intrusive to send a text message that makes a single light sound upon its arrival. With text messages, the recipient has full control over when to view and respond.

Boomers regard voice calls as conversations, which are important ways to establish and grow rapport. On the other hand, Millennials regard voice calls as more urgent, compelling, and overused. Millennials don’t want to tell you anything on a phone call that they can relay effectively in an email. If a Millennial wants to talk, they’ll always text first asking for a time to talk.

If you have Boomers and Millennials on your team, you have already experienced some of the challenges listed above. To resolve it, here are some suggestions:

1. Dedicate time for the Millennials to show you how they communicate. Get familiar with the new tools and how Millennials use them to be connected 24/7. Use texting, etc., with people in and out of work until you understand its value.

2. Ask the Millennials to figure out how to use texting and Facebook (or private alternative) to help your team be connected 24/7 in a virtual setting. Agree as a multi-generation team which technologies and practices to adopt and which to eliminate.

3. Follow the Japanese model. If you have a problem communicating with one other generation at work, go out to get a beer together after work and talk privately about it.

Technology will always evolve faster than our ability to learn how to apply it. Millennials offer us a quick leap into the future. We need to listen and adapt—or be short on skills for the future.



Jaclyn Kostner, Ph.D. Bridge the Distance. www.distance.com